You might think that assessing the relative merits of every album by my favorite band since childhood would be no thang for a seasoned pro like me. That’s where you’d be wrong, Bono — er, boyo. Rating the U2 catalogue turned out to be as difficult and time-consuming as it is pointless.

Be that as it may, in a kind attempt to prevent you, Gentle Reader, from frittering many irreplaceable hours of your life thinking about this between now and five days hence, when U2’s giant space-claw touches down at FedEx Field, I have valiantly endeavored to count down the U2 canon (minus live albums, compilations, EPs, soundtracks, side projects, or bootlegs) from weakest to mightiest.

You’re seated comfortably? Delightful. Let’s begin.

A shorter, less obsessive, non-YouTube-enhanced version of this roundup appears on Post Rock. And if you’re only interested in reading about U2’s top six albums as chosen by me, you can skip ahead.